Assess and decide · Guide
Beginning a relationship between two communities
Partnerships do not always arrive through an organized framework. Many begin the other way round: someone knew someone, someone came back from a trip, someone heard about a community that reminded them of their own. That is a perfectly good beginning — it simply needs a few decisions to become a relationship.
How to find the other side
- Through someone who already knows. A member with family there, a former shaliach, someone who studied abroad. Ties that last almost always start with one person rather than a cold approach.
- Through an existing framework. If your regional council is already in a partnership, you can ask to be connected to one community within it. That is a significant shortcut.
- Through a real resemblance. A similar size, a similar story, a similar challenge. Two communities facing the same thing will still have something to talk about in the third year.
- Through a movement or organization. Youth movements and national bodies know communities abroad, and an introduction through them arrives with a relationship already attached.
The first conversation
The common mistake is to open with an offer. Better to open with a question.
1
Say who you are, briefly. How many families,
where, and what is on your mind this year. Three minutes, not a
presentation.
2
Ask who they are. And listen properly. Most
communities abroad have never been asked by Israelis what occupies
them.
3
Ask what they would like. Not what they can
give — what they would like to receive. The question surprises people, and that is
exactly why it works.
4
Offer one small thing. A video call between two
groups, a greeting before a festival, a shared class. Not an annual
plan.
The first year should be deliberately small. A new relationship that
opens with a delegation and a budget usually breaks in its second year, when it becomes
clear nobody can sustain the pace. One that opens with three video calls and a single
shared Shabbat continues. Start small so that you can carry on.
Three decisions before going further
1
Who leads on our side. One name, and preferably
two. If there is none, that is the first decision, before anything
else.
2
What we bring. Even a small community brings
something: a home to host in, a Shabbat, young people, the story of a place. See
what we have to give.
3
When we speak next. A date, not “we will be
in touch”. That is the difference between a pleasant introduction and a
relationship.
Tomorrow morning
Ask one question in your community: who among us already has a tie to a Jewish community abroad? The answers will surprise you, and that is where this starts. Then open In Twos and fill in the three questions.
כלי אחד בשבוע, ישירות אליכם
כל יום שלישי בבוקר נפתח כאן כלי אחד מהמטע לשבעה ימים. משאירים מספר, ומקבלים הודעה אחת בשבוע - בלי קבוצה ובלי רעש.